nekokoban | [ficlets][Bleach and Fullmetal Alchemist]

YAY I HAVE FINALLY CAUGHT UP ON THIS THREAD. Now I can work on the HaruKan 20 omg kill me dead noooooooow.

We now have water guns stationed all over our house, in event that the cat misbehaves -- but apparently, they work on the dog, too. Score.

Monster Movie
Bleach
Ichigo + Orihime (and a little Rukia); for

zinjadu
Prompt: Space, trees, travel

"And they look kind of like this --" Orihime threw her arms open wide, "and they've got teeth like this --" she curved her fingers to demonstrate, "and they make a sound like, 'oooOOoooOOooo,' and --"

"Oi, what the hell are you two talking about?"

"Kurosaki-kun!" Orihime turned and beamed at him. "I was just telling Kuchiki-san about the movie idea I had last night!"

"Movie." Ichigo blinked at her. "You had an idea for a movie."

"Yes!" Orihime nodded. "A movie with tree aliens!"

"Tree aliens ..."

"From space!" She beamed. From behind her, Rukia lifted one hand in a distracted wave; otherwise, she seemed entirely enthralled by Orihime's story. And it looked to be her genuinely interested face, rather than the one she slapped on whenever she didn't know what the hell someone was talking about.

"I ... see ..." Ichigo rubbed the back of his head. "In that case --"

"Don't you want to hear about them too, Kurosaki-kun?" Orihime was suddenly in his face, all wide-eyed enthusiasm. Ichigo staggered back a step in surprise. "They live on the moon!"

"The moon." Ichigo thought about running, then considered the fact that Rukia could probably trip him up before he got too far. The stupid bitch took a perverse pleasure in seeing him sweat. "That's nice, Inoue ..."

"And they look like this and they have teeth like this and they --"

"Inoue." Ichigo tapped the center of her forehead with one finger. She squeaked and then fell silent, staring at him with wide eyes. "That's all right. You don't have to tell me."

She pouted at him. "But, Kurosaki-kuuuuun --"

"Inoue-san," said Rukia, "if you tell him the whole thing, then he wouldn't be able to watch it, would he?"

"Ah!" Orihime's eyes went wider. "That's right! Kurosaki-kun, I didn't know you wanted to see it!"

"I didn't --" he began, and was overrode by Orihime clasping his hands and beaming.

"That's wonderful, Kurosaki-kun!" She grabbed his hands, beaming. "It's such a good movie idea, so I think you'll really like it, too! There are tree aliens from space, and there's cheese men, and then Godzilla takes them all to the moon to fight the tree aliens --"

Ichigo let the sound of her babble wash over him, waiting until he heard a break in the steady chatter, and said, "Inoue."

"Kurosaki-kun?" After a moment, she seemed to realize she was holding onto his hands, and dropped them with a squeak. "Ah! I --"

"It's fine," he said. "Show me the script later, or something."

"Re-- really?" She seemed more shocked and embarrassed by the idea than anything else. "You mean it? Kurosaki-kun?"

"Eh." He shrugged. "I've got time this weekend maybe. Uh --"

"I'm sure you'll like it," she said, wide-eyed. "It'll be fun! Don't forget to bring your leaf."

"My leaf?" Ichigo blinked. "Why?"

"Because it'll be your costume," she told him. "You can't make a proper movie unless you've got the right costumes. I'm going be Godzilla, of course. I made the costume myself, and then Tatsuki-chan and Chizuru-chan and anyone else can be the tree aliens and Kuchiki-san --"

"If I have a leaf," Ichigo interrupted, before she could gather steam, "then who the hell am I supposed to be?"

"Eh? The hero, of course." Orihime stepped back and struck a dramatic pose. "The hero who emerges from the secret village of the koropokkuru to save the world! For everyone!"

"... ah. Is that so."

"Yes!"

"And you want me to be in it --"

"You have to be, Kurosaki-kun! Otherwise the world won't be saved!"

He could argue that, he thought, then sighed, smiling in spite of himself. "All right, Inoue. I'll save the world for you."

"Really?" She clapped. "Thank you, Kurosaki-kun! Oh, this is wonderful, I have to go tell Tatsuki-chan --" She dashed off, still chattering excitedly to herself. Rukia snorted and leaned back, crossing her arms over her chest.

"Oho," she said. "Someone seems to be interested --"

"Say it and die, bitch," he told her, and sat down. "It's just easier making her happy than anything else."

Rukia only snickered and let the rest go.

--end--

++++++++++++++++++++++

An Office Relationship
Fullmetal Alchemist; [anime AU]
Roy/Ed; for

shukiai
Prompt: Office. Dog(Black Hayate?). Trouble

The trouble with having one's relationship as an open secret was that no one looked the other way.

As long as it wasn't official, even if everyone knew what was going on, people would stop to gawk, or stare, or even try to catch them in the halls -- though certainly they were professional as they could be in the office, and their general idea of a "date" was for Ed to bring his research books over to Roy's house and fall asleep on his couch. He couldn't even greet Ed now, without someone in the background laughing, or coughing, or both.

This, however, was the final straw.

"Lieutenant," he said, his eyebrow twitching, "what is this?"

Black Hayate yipped obligingly and wagged his tail. He was stationed right inside of Roy's door, his ears perked up and forward, looking on the alert. Hawkeye looked at him serenely, the day's paperwork held in her arms. "Insurance, sir," she said. "To make sure you actually get your work done, and don't sneak off to see Edward in the meantime."

"Sneak off," he said. "I wouldn't do anything like that, Lieutenant."

She held out the paperwork, her expression unchanging. "Then, it's to make sure you don't smuggle him into your office," she said. "These need to be finished today, sir. Please don't slack off."

Roy sighed and took the files from her; the stack felt depressingly heavy. "Do I even get a lunch break?" he asked.

If she noticed the whine in his voice, she didn't say. "Half an hour, sir. Any longer than that, and you start slacking off again."

He opened his mouth to protest, and she left him at that, closing the door firmly behind her. Roy set his chin on hand and studied the dog. The dog blinked back.

"I could always go through the window," he said. "It's a long drop, but I can always transmute an escape route first."

Black Hayate's ears went back, and he growled. It was the first time Roy had ever heard him make such a sound. Surprised, he stared, and Hayate growled again, deeper and more meaningful.

"... Right, right," Roy sighed, and set to work.

Ed appeared nearly an hour later, opening the door and almost tripping over the dog. "Hey," he said. "What the fuck?"

Roy glanced up at him and smiled, wryly. "We're being chaperoned," he said.

"By the dog." Ed's look was disbelieving. "You're fucking kidding me."

"I have learned, Fullmetal," Roy told him, "that when Lieutenant Hawkeye tells you something, it's much safer to believe her than otherwise." He glanced at the dog, then put his pen down. "But I don't think she'd begrudge us a greeting."

Ed looked suspicious. Black Hayate rose to his feet and wagged his tail.

"You're so fucking weird," Ed sighed, though he closed the door behind him and crossed over to Roy's desk. "They know anyway, so why --"

"Because," Roy said, leaning forward in his chair, smiling as Ed hitched up one hip on the edge of the desk, "it's always good to keep your options open."

Ed scowled at him blackly. "You're an asshole," he said. "I'm not doing this for your ego, you know."

"I know." Roy reached out and caught Ed's chin, pulling him down for a brief kiss. It tasted like coffee, unsweetened, and Roy made a pleased sound, letting his hand slide up to Ed's nape, cradling there. Ed grumbled at him through the kiss, but didn't fight it, and even shifted closer.

And then he yelped, breaking the kiss and sliding off the desk. "Ow! Hey, what --"

Black Hayate shook his head, with part of one of Ed's pant legs in his mouth. He growled.

"You really weren't kidding about the chaperone thing," Ed said, sounding bemused. "Ow, leggo, dog." He shook his foot until Hayate let go and sat down, wagging his tail.

"I told you," Roy said, with a shrug. "Lieutenant Hawkeye has trained him well."

"Yeah." Ed blinked, leaning back against the desk. "I can't make out while a dog's watching."

"You were doing fine before, Fullmetal."

"I forgot the dog was there." Ed made a face. "I dunno, it'd be like ... like some kid was watching. Ugh." He shuddered, then shook his head. "You got your damn greeting. I'm going to be in the library till you get off work. If I'm not there, send a search party." He stood and stretched, cracking his neck; for such a young man, his joints popped enough that Roy's own ached in sympathy.

"Is that all?" Roy raised an eyebrow. "One kiss and an IOU? Fullmetal --"

"I'm a lousy date," Ed said with a shrug, "but hell, I'm a good lay." He rolled his eyes. "Plus, I don't wanna be on the business end of Lieutenant Hawkeye's gun. Get some work done, piece of shit Colonel. I'll see you later." He tossed a wave over his shoulder and was gone, leaving Roy with the dog and a half-finished stack of paperwork. Roy blinked after him, then looked down at the dog.

"Damn," he said.

Black Hayate barked and wagged his tail.

--end--

Current Mood: cheerful

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Date: 2005-05-20 12:00 am (UTC)

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