this is all we got now

I could be really depressing and doom and gloom about certain things (which basically you'd only know about if you know me irl and have heard me bring it up/are my roommate and listened to me spazz on the phone at my parents for the better part of an hour, hahaha. I COULD. But Doom hasn't happened yet, I have alternatives I can look into ... and really, I'm okay. I am also just a worrier with a tendency towards the paranoid who bottles it in -- I AM TRYING TO BE BETTER ABOUT THAT. HENCE THE CALL TO MY PARENTS. (Sometimes I worry that my mom misses me more than she says, because she gets very :( if we don't talk at least twice a week, even if it's only five minutes where I confirm that I am still, in fact, alive, but at the same time she is apparently making friends with ladies in the neighborhood! THEY HAVE A GARDENING CLUB GUYS, i-it's so cute. She was bragging about her lettuces and her lemons and telling me how she gave them to people and got stuff back and. ♥)

Instead I will note (in a kind of orz what) way about how my recent back problems have taken what should be a ten-minute walk to something like twenty, and that's just sad. It's less my back now and more my hips, which I had been warned about, but sheesh. I am entirely too young to be this old. :'( I bought one of those back pillow thingits at Walgreens the other day, and it seems to be helping! Especially when I lean back. I think this office chair was designed for someone taller, because it leans back a lot farther than I like and if I sit properly for back posture my toes pretty much just touch the ground.

Or I could gripe about how the (writing) force is still not with me, and this grieves me terrible. :\ I KEEP TRYING. I KEEP ... NOT MAKING IT. I have a word document that's full of linebreaks and two-line stand-alone paragraphs that make very little sense. I have fantastic images but nothing that connects them together. It saddens me. I DID MANAGE TO FINISH A STORY FOR imaginarybeasts and I signed up for Yuletide s-so I am taking some heart from that.

... I should write my Yuletide author letter ... I'll do that this weekend.

Also, I like this song more than I really should. It's all -- not really my normal thing (I heard it described as militant-sounding? it fits), but it's been stuck in my head for going on two weeks now, so hopefully someone else will share my pain.

Uhhhh, what else. Man, why am I so boring. I guess if anyone wants me to love on them, they should comment on this post! And because I'm bad at keeping up with this meme on my flist, you can tell me if you love me, too.

OR DON'T LOVE ME, IN INTEREST OF ALL FAIRNESS man, I give up on interesting, I'm going and getting lunch.